This is good enough for him actually. He isn't going to force Ryo to have some kind of wild adventure with feelings.]
Yeah. That happens. I just want you to know... that's okay. For them to be there. If you ever feel confused or lost, you should stop [he reaches up to gently tap a claw on ryo's forehead] thinking for a bit and listen to the thing in the middle.
[He taps after in the middle of Ryo's chest. Heart.]
I don't see an alternative. If I go back exactly where I left off, God is going to attack. Even if I go back earlier, God will still eventually attack even if it's not at that exact time. I can't defeat God without the demons, but using the demons will alert God more quickly.
[ so, basically. they actually need some kind of plan on how to do this and they aren't sure if they will be able to think of something that will work before the weekend. ]
[Hm. It's hard to tell what this means to Akira because his face doesn't exactly make a lot of changes currently, not really. He does not let go of Ryo's hand, though.]
Kaoru is going to get old and die one day, [he says reluctantly.] Like I would have. I'm going to have to watch that happen.
[Maybe. Being Devilman... if he isn't living at least a much longer lifespan than normal, he'll definitely be immortal in some fashion. He hadn't really thought about it until mentioning it to Ryo about how he would have died one day himself.]
[Ryo is so funny. GIVING KAORU 77 YEARS TO LIVE ONLY. The gay lifespan.]
So if I do go somewhere, no matter where it is, I'll probably be coming back.
[He doesn't know shit about what the future holds. Maybe they will simply all be stuck here anyway which would be funny. He finds he does not have much of a problem with that actually. It had always been his plan before.
However, if he does leave for whatever reason, there isn't any point in staying after that.]
[ ryo can't really say this news makes them happy, because it's still akira choosing to be with kaoru over them and just showing up once the guy's dead. it's still better than never seeing him again at least, but... ]
[ it's something they're trying not to think about. it's one thing to talk casually about the future now, but ryo has no idea how they will actually react when the time actually comes.
[He follows Ryo’s gaze down to their hands. He frowns, if it can be called that.
He isn’t sure why it hurts him so much when the now dying ember of everything Ryo had done to him is there, only fading. He shouldn’t be sad, or sorry, or any of it in the grand scheme of things, but…
He can’t help the empathy in his heart which returned after what seemed like the finality of death.]
You’re my best friend, Ryo. You won’t forget… right?
[ so much of ryo's... everything revolves around akira, to the point that they went out of their way to make the most convoluted plan in the world to make sure he would survive the end of the world.
but akira is someone who cares about so many people, and who wants to live a normal life. and objectively speaking those are good things, and he deserves to have them. but ryo is not objective. ]
before coming to hell, ryo's life revolved around their fight against the demons which slowly turned to turning against the humans instead. their choices have been less about being happy and more just for what they thought was best for the world. despite how much ryo can enjoy violence, they don't resort to it necessarily because they think it's fun or because it makes them happy. they just see it as something that needs to be done.
how do you live for yourself? or find your own happiness? it's a concept that seems so foreign. ]
Akira, nothing is going to make me happy. And I'm fine with that. That's not really a bad thing.
He glances at them, long enough to have his picture taken, but then quickly looks away shyly afterward. He's embarrassed Ryo wants a picture of him as Devilman even though this is clearly something Ryo has always wanted.]
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This is good enough for him actually. He isn't going to force Ryo to have some kind of wild adventure with feelings.]
Yeah. That happens. I just want you to know... that's okay. For them to be there. If you ever feel confused or lost, you should stop [he reaches up to gently tap a claw on ryo's forehead] thinking for a bit and listen to the thing in the middle.
[He taps after in the middle of Ryo's chest. Heart.]
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ryo glances down at akira's hand, and then looks back up at his face. ]
That'll probably make it more confusing. [ ... ] Is that how you always figure things out?
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This is terrible advice to Ryo who only Thinks and does not Feel, unlike SOMEONE else. Confusing. Ryo is correct (in a me voice).]
I guess... most of the time. I listen to what my heart says. Sometimes... it conflicts. What you think and what it tells you.
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And how do you deal with that all the time...?
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[Ryo is so funny, running into the human-like limitations of emotions.]
I cry.
[He'll just say it.]
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but okay, that makes ryo laugh faintly. they raise a hand and place it on akira's cheek. ]
You definitely do.
[ everyone noticed.... ]
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It helps.
[For the record. He opens his eyes again.]
You're going to stay here, Ryo?
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I don't see an alternative. If I go back exactly where I left off, God is going to attack. Even if I go back earlier, God will still eventually attack even if it's not at that exact time. I can't defeat God without the demons, but using the demons will alert God more quickly.
[ so, basically. they actually need some kind of plan on how to do this and they aren't sure if they will be able to think of something that will work before the weekend. ]
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Kaoru is going to get old and die one day, [he says reluctantly.] Like I would have. I'm going to have to watch that happen.
[Maybe. Being Devilman... if he isn't living at least a much longer lifespan than normal, he'll definitely be immortal in some fashion. He hadn't really thought about it until mentioning it to Ryo about how he would have died one day himself.]
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... most likely, yes. Your lifespan is no longer a human's.
[ that's gonna be awk in 60 years, ryo supposes ]
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So if I do go somewhere, no matter where it is, I'll probably be coming back.
[He doesn't know shit about what the future holds. Maybe they will simply all be stuck here anyway which would be funny. He finds he does not have much of a problem with that actually. It had always been his plan before.
However, if he does leave for whatever reason, there isn't any point in staying after that.]
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[ ryo can't really say this news makes them happy, because it's still akira choosing to be with kaoru over them and just showing up once the guy's dead. it's still better than never seeing him again at least, but... ]
Well, that's far off in the future.
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[This is actually the priority, but he isn’t sure if it’s at all possible really.]
I want to see you. I don’t want to say goodbye for good.
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[ it's something they're trying not to think about. it's one thing to talk casually about the future now, but ryo has no idea how they will actually react when the time actually comes.
they glance down at their hands. ]
We might never see each other again.
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He isn’t sure why it hurts him so much when the now dying ember of everything Ryo had done to him is there, only fading. He shouldn’t be sad, or sorry, or any of it in the grand scheme of things, but…
He can’t help the empathy in his heart which returned after what seemed like the finality of death.]
You’re my best friend, Ryo. You won’t forget… right?
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[ so much of ryo's... everything revolves around akira, to the point that they went out of their way to make the most convoluted plan in the world to make sure he would survive the end of the world.
but akira is someone who cares about so many people, and who wants to live a normal life. and objectively speaking those are good things, and he deserves to have them. but ryo is not objective. ]
I'm always going to think of you.
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[It’s growled a little more than necessary because he is a demon, but it’s fine.
The only reason he lets their hand go is so he can flap forward and wrap his arms around their neck.]
I’ll think of you. Whatever happens, Ryo, make a choice for yourself. Not for me. Make a choice for you and what makes you happy.
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ryo: ???????
before coming to hell, ryo's life revolved around their fight against the demons which slowly turned to turning against the humans instead. their choices have been less about being happy and more just for what they thought was best for the world. despite how much ryo can enjoy violence, they don't resort to it necessarily because they think it's fun or because it makes them happy. they just see it as something that needs to be done.
how do you live for yourself? or find your own happiness? it's a concept that seems so foreign. ]
Akira, nothing is going to make me happy. And I'm fine with that. That's not really a bad thing.
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Not entirely at Ryo. At the circumstances.
He pulls away and flaps back, but offers his hand again.]
I don’t want to talk about it. Let’s fly around.
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they take the offered hand and gives it a squeeze. ]
We can find another spot to take a picture?
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[He returns the squeeze, then turns around and takes off, dragging Ryo along through the air with him by the hand.
Nowhere in particular really, just flying over the city. Maybe does a few unintentional loops.]
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they hold out their phone and snap another picture of akira. ]
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He glances at them, long enough to have his picture taken, but then quickly looks away shyly afterward. He's embarrassed Ryo wants a picture of him as Devilman even though this is clearly something Ryo has always wanted.]
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... perfect.
[ they are going to hold the phone out again, this time to take a picture of both of them. ]
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He tries to make sure he's in the frame, but can't really move much closer than they already are when they both are full of wings.]
You like pictures, Ryo?
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